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What’s in a Name?

March 25, 2014 By: Debbie Smith18 Comments

thZ2TPY5I3Based on my name alone, I often wonder if my parents thought they were having kittens rather than twins. I desperately want to believe my name selection resulted from last-minute spontaneity. Like, “Oh hey, how ‘bout we just call that one Debbie!” rather than something that took my parents nine months to land on. (Well, it was actually seven months in our case, but still).

 DEBBIE???

Really mom and dad?

I don’t want to be a “Debbie” Downer.  But…

Debbie is a snack cake that mean people joke about with chubby people! Little Debbie Cakes

You put money on your “Debby” (debit card), you don’t put that name on this adorable, sweet baby girl!

Debbie is a boozy group of playboy wannabes that drape themselves around men. As in, “Look at that group of Debbie’s!”

Furthermore, it’s a name given to women born in the 1950’s who own bowling balls, wear bolo ties and actually prefer to go by the nickname “Deb” (as if to say Don’t Even Bother, gentlemen!).

Honestly, I can’t imagine my creative, intelligent parents sitting together each night, mulling over the future names of their children and intentionally settling on such a dull, drab and generic name as “Debbie Smith.”

Let’s face it, I have a placeholder name.

“Debbie Smith” refers to nobody in particular and everyone in general!

I’m serious. Do you know how many people meet me and respond with, “I went to school with a Debbie Smith?” Trust me, it’s a lot! But unlike this Debbie Smith, I’m betting most of those Debbie’s have actually “done” something in Dallas. HA!

Screen shot 2014-03-22 at 1.04.45 PM

And Geezo Pete — there are over 700 of me on Facebook and 65,200,000 of me can be found in a Google search. EEKS!

Debbie, Debbie, Debbie Dot Generic Dot Com.

Yep, I happen to own one of the most broad-minded, nondescript names I’ve ever come in contact with, and it happens to be mine.  It happens to be me!

While a name for most is a label used to distinguish one person from another, in my case the name Debbie has me lumped into a massive batch of big-boned women in their 50’s and 60’s with arm tattoos, cell phones on their hips that gnaw on chewing tobacco.

And Smith?  Well! We all know Smith is the most common surname in the United Kingdom, Australia and the United States.  For crying out loud, 1 out of every 100 persons in those countries shares my last name…

“Well hello all of me, nice to meet us!”

And if that’s not reason enough to struggle with my identity, I have an identical twin sister!

{…TAKES A DEEP BREATH}

But let me tell you something…

There is this crazy thing that I’m guessing happens to all of us who have been assigned generic names — more often than not, it infuses us with an overmastering desire to be unique.

When a name doesn’t stand tall, the individual must.

It’s weird, I know, but I’ve always felt as though I have an unspoken allegiance to all those with whom I share the name Debbie Smith. An obligation, if you will, to add some credence and weight to our universal moniker. After all, I don’t want to do our name a disservice!

Actually, it’s not unlike my commitment to my identical twin to refrain from doing something idiotic in public that someone might mistakenly pin on her. Otherwise, I’m positive I would have danced on a few tables by now and/or become a complete embarrassment of a contestant on a Reality TV show!

Oh, were it not for my overmastering commitment to all the other Debbie Smiths out there, I single-handedly would have been responsible for putting the DEB in debauchery by now! Hahahaha!

 

 

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Comments

  1. Ashley harrison says

    March 26, 2014 at 8:49 am

    So funny Debbie! I love your writing!! You have an awesome sense-of-humor. You are definitely no ordinary, run-of-the-mill Debbie!👏🆒🌟

    Reply
  2. RTS says

    March 27, 2014 at 10:47 am

    Hi I am so grateful I found your webpage, I really found you by mistake, while I was browsing on Yahoo for something else, Anyhow I am here now and would just like to say kudos for a remarkably funny post and a all round exciting blog (I also love the theme/design), I don’t have time to read it all at the minute but I have saved it and also added in your RSS feeds, so when I have time I will be back to read more, Please do keep up the excellent.

    Reply
  3. Pam says

    April 3, 2014 at 1:57 pm

    Cute! Why arent you writing for a magazine?

    Reply
  4. Barb says

    April 8, 2014 at 9:52 pm

    you know what’s so funny about this, is I think ‘barb’ and the dreaded ‘barbie’ version is on the same playing field, no? Ahh, well, and I move on. Thanks again for your visit via SITS

    Reply
  5. PT says

    April 9, 2014 at 1:24 am

    Hey there! I’ve been reading your web site for some time now and finally got the bravery to go ahead and give you a shout out from Porter Texas! Just wanted to say keep up the excellent job!|

    Reply
  6. Karen dawkins says

    April 24, 2014 at 3:25 pm

    Haha! I’m curious. What’s your twins name?

    I’m a member of the boring names club too. 🙂
    Karen dawkins recently posted…Staycation Weekend: I wanna rock ‘n roll all night!My Profile

    Reply
    • Debbie Smith says

      April 24, 2014 at 3:29 pm

      My twin’s name is DeeDee. DeeDee and Debbie. We sound like a country singing duo. 🙂

      Reply
  7. SharonB says

    April 24, 2014 at 3:28 pm

    Loved reading this!! I always hated my name too…I know SO many women named Sharon and there were 3 of us in my graduating class. 🙂
    SharonB recently posted…Words Wound UsMy Profile

    Reply
  8. Jennifer Hall says

    April 24, 2014 at 5:43 pm

    Hi, Jennifer here. Jennifer Hall, to be exact. There are quite a few of me out there as well. I totally get what you say about representing other Debbies. That thought has crossed my mind as a Jennifer as well. I went though a phase when I was a kid when I wanted my name to be April. I was born in April and I just thought it would be cool. Now I think it’s pretty dumb.

    So, what would you rather be named?
    Jennifer Hall recently posted…The View From Here: Listening to my Middle-SchoolerMy Profile

    Reply
  9. Kels @ Blonder Side of LIfe says

    April 24, 2014 at 5:48 pm

    Haha is it bad that I laughed at this entire post? Well most of it anyway. I’ve only ever know a few Kelsey’s so I can’t say that I feel it’s all that generic at least in my generation so I can’t relate. I do however, love your spin at the end of becoming unique. More power to ya girl 😀
    Kels @ Blonder Side of LIfe recently posted…Recipe For a Great WeekendMy Profile

    Reply
    • Debbie Smith says

      April 24, 2014 at 5:49 pm

      Kels, it would only be bad if you didn’t laugh at all! My work here is done. 🙂

      Reply
  10. Robin Avidor says

    April 24, 2014 at 6:49 pm

    My mother named me after a soap opera actor that was killed off soon after I was born. I was supposed to be named Donna Marie but my mom said my aunt stole the name for her baby born two months before me. (Thank you Aunt Mary RIP)
    Robin Avidor recently posted…Soleil Toujours Organic SkincareMy Profile

    Reply
  11. Debbie says

    April 24, 2014 at 7:02 pm

    As a fellow Debbie, not Debi or Debora, or Deborah just Debbie and I love our name and am currently using my given name to market myself. I am in development of a show called Debbie Does Home Entertaining 🙂 Google “Debbie Does” and when you get past the obvious stuff there is some funny stuff…hopefully to make you smile or laugh to feel better about being a fellow Debbie.
    Debbie recently posted…Pinterest inspires me because…My Profile

    Reply
  12. Maureen says

    April 24, 2014 at 8:48 pm

    Wonderful post!. As another who dislikes her name I can so relate. Try finding anything with your name on it back in the 70’s? Ha ha!
    Maureen recently posted…Help me please: Five weeks to the wedding countdown.My Profile

    Reply
  13. Wilma jones says

    April 25, 2014 at 8:23 am

    I love your style! Founf you on the SITS FB share. I will be back!

    http://www.LivingHappierAfter.com
    Wilma jones recently posted…An Open Mind. And A Broken Toe.My Profile

    Reply
  14. Esta fiesta says

    April 25, 2014 at 10:17 am

    Hahaha! I can kinda relate. I hate my name – it sounds old so I’m constantly trying to do things that don’t make me seem like I’m 80!!

    Reply
  15. Clotilde/Craftybegonia says

    September 10, 2014 at 7:30 pm

    Hi, visiting you via the SITS girls. Your name is beautiful! I have an excruciatingly rare name and most people mispronounce it and call me by other names that sound more familiar, so I am lost out there in exoticland, And at the end of the day, very few remember my real name. so in the blogersfield I have become what I do (a name really easy to remember), and now, a large crowd think they know me. Hope this serves as some consolation, LOL! Wish you the best with your blog.
    Clotilde/Craftybegonia recently posted…AselleMy Profile

    Reply
  16. Sally says

    September 10, 2014 at 11:10 pm

    Common names do tend to be frustrating but look at it this way: at least your parents saved you the embarrassment of having a ‘unique’ name by simple spelling a normal name differently 😝 happy SITS day!

    Reply

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About Debbie

Debbie J. Smith lives in Austin, Texas and is the published writer, stand-up comedian and former NFL cheerleader who lowered her bar so much she tripped on it.

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